Never Came

Look at the stars, see them burn
So beautiful in the night
Wishing to have been one
To burn the pain away
The way you have changed me
It scares me deep inside
I just want you to go away

Can I jump so high
Leave you behind
Cry at night, your my tears
Throw them away
I wish you never came

An infection that has taken over
no medicine to make it better
Cut me open and take you out
or are you to deep for me to be a cured
can never recover from the poisoned touch
The pieces are far to damaged
No healing can be done

Can I jump so high
Leave you behind
Cry at night, your my tears
Throw them away
I wish you never came

Electric in my head
turning on and off at will
feelings I don't want
they run through me
Stop me, control me, like a puppet
I don't know what to do
I need to be cleansed of you

Can I jump so high
Leave you behind
Cry at night, your my tears
Throw them away
I wish you never came

Inside every part of me
I wish you never came
Let you burn in the stars
wish you never came
Cry, throw away my tears
Jump so high
Leave you behind
I wish you wasn't here

The Effects

Time ticks on and my mind goes array
Thoughts are carrying me away
I worry about what will happen
my choices affect so much
Time will tell me what to do eventually
But I am not sure I can wait that long
I wonder if I can figure it out as I sing my song

Ripples in the water are our choices
They run across so much
Flap my wings and be selfish
But I can't help but wonder what Tsunami might come
I can't bring that down on anyone
Which way should take off

Everyday we just make choices
Not knowing what they do
We think they might not hurt anyone
But in a way they effect everyone
I don't want to cause rocky waters
I don't want to sink someones boat
But choices have to be made so I think as I go on

Ripples in the water are our choices
They run across so much
Flap my wings and be selfish
But I can't help but wonder what Tsunami might come
I can't bring that down on anyone
Which way should take off

How do we live knowing
That we have caused pain someplace
Broken relationships become of our choices
At times it is hard to just listen
But they keep telling me to put me first
Be selfish its worth it
Not sure if it truly is

Ripples in the water are our choices
They run across so much
Flap my wings an be selfish
But I can't help but wonder what Tsunami might come
I can't bring that down on anyone
Which way should take off

Ripples, wings flap
Winds change
It's a fact it effects
Everything

Stand wishing

You, you don't know
What it's like to not have your touch anymore
A whisper blows across my shoulder
I close my eyes and I can fantasize
your caresse against my skin
the feeling once again
but as easily as the breeze comes
it goes away

Somewhere you are with someone else in your arms
where I once was, where I wish
I could be, But here I am
standing only wishing to be

Sit and try to find a way
To not think about everyday
go on about my life in the dark
I want to hide, stay away form
so many things because I'm so afraid
don't know what to do or what to say
All I know is


Somewhere you are with someone
else in your arms
Where I was, Where I wish
I could be, but here I am
standing
only wishing to be

Why can't these memories be washed away
out of my mind, taken so I don't have them close

Or you could be brought back to me
things cna return to the way they use to be

But I guess for now
I will stay in the dark
standing
and keep wishing

Somewhere you are with someone
else in your arms
Where I was, Where I wish
I could be, but here I am
standing
only wishing to be

Just like the wind

A whisper I hear it
It tells me not to fear it
I go on and feel it
To know it to steal it
I want to hold it close
To never let it go
But I know

With the wind it blows away
it will never stay one place
comes and goes changes it's mind
it's direction moves all the time
You whisper your words
And I hear them But they leave
Just like the wind

A heart beat rings in my ears
the blood runs strong through my veins
Your are near that how I know
You can fill me with so much warmth
with you words
when you leave you take them with you
leave me empty, you come and go
But I know

With the wind it blows away
it will never stay one place
comes and goes changes it's mind
it's direction moves all the time
You whisper your words
And I hear them But they leave
Just like the wind

Just for once won't you
say something to me that is true
stop with all your lies
I can't get the rain out of my eyes
I need the sun i need the warmth
I want the wind gone
Things with you will never change
The wind will always stay the same
It is a sad sad shame

With the wind it blows away
it will never stay one place
comes and goes changes it's mind
it's direction moves all the time
You whisper your words
And I hear them But they leave
Just like the wind

To bad your just the wind
Can't stay still
Unable to make up your mind
Your just the wind.

Break for a Wish

Temptation of your kiss

Sweetness of your lips

Calls to me and begs me to come

I have to find the will to fight it

The warmth from your arms

Wrapped around me so tight

Protect me form harm

But it all can be dangerous

I have to find a way to stop this

I need to break for a wish

Want to know how to resist the fastest of all this

Get through all of this give me a lamp to rub

I want to answer to all of this

A wish bone please give

I need to break for a wish

My smile is because of you

You have no idea what your words make me feel

You lift me up when I am down

You can be my strength when I am weak

I need you

But I need time to think it through

I need to break for a wish

Want to know how to resist the fastest of all this

Get through all of this give me a lamp to rub

I want to answer to all of this

A wish bone please give

I need to break for a wish

Your touch sooths me

Your eyes tell me

Everything I need to know

I am falling fast and hard now

I miss you too much when you are not around

I need to find a way to slow down

But I can’t I want just want to be with you

I need to break for a wish

Want to know how to resist the fastest of all this

Get through all of this give me a lamp to rub

I want to answer to all of this

A wish bone please give

I need to break for a wish

Break, Break for a wish

Give me, give me the best chance in all this

I need to

Break for a wish

Need to say

Sitting here, Staring at you
Watching your lips move
The words that come out don't make sense
your tellin' me that your sorry you
should have never left
you want to be able to hold me again

Sorry but I can't do this any more
Tired of crying over you
you left me in the cold so confused
sitting wondering why
I need to pull it together
and finally say good bye

You left me and I blamed myself
looking at photos wondering what else
what did I do to lose you tell me what I said
But now I know I need to move ahead

Sorry but I can't do this any more
Tired of crying over you
you left me in the cold so confused
sitting wondering why
I need to pull it together
and finally say good bye

Crying alone in the dark
sitting by the phone
waiting for an email
need an explanation
I needed to know why
but now I know that all I need
Is to say goodbye

Sorry I can't do this any more
Tired of crying alone on the floor
You left me in the cold you left confused
What was I suppose to do
What was I to think
But now I know
what I gotta do
Is say Goodbye  

Make-up remover - Dreams

I sleep.. The dreams come filled with many things. Some good, some bad and some just there. But with my eyes closed  I have no control over what comes and goes in my head. So much time has come since things ended. Your voice barely something I can recall in a waken state. Yet my dreams lately have been filled with you. Not of some fantasy that will never come to be being rescued  from the depths of a cave after being kidnapped by vikings. Lost on a trip into the wilderness and saved by a handsome  woodsman that know the woods so well and keep me company and helps me and we fall in love. None of that, not even close. No they are filled of every day things. watching TV and talking about the shows or stupid things people say on Facebook.

Sitting on the couch watching you put together something and getting mad and I laugh under my breath. Things that are normal. Everyday happening things. Never dream of you coming back and telling me your sorry for leaving and hurting me. They are like nothing bad ever happened. I can feel myself smiling while I am sleeping. The happiness from the dreams wash over me and take over while the rest of the world can't see and goes on. These are things that could very well happen and could be. But then I waken. I am in bed with you not laying next to me. and the sadness and pain form when you left that has taken a long time to get over comes back with a vengeance. The tears stream down my face. the happiness I once felt that was real not just a dream is gone and I am reminded of how it left.

Left with a hole once again, one that I thought had healed over. Like putting salt in a very fresh wound it stings and hurts. A scar that no one can see but me. No one will ever know how much it hurt or how big it is. Covered up with smiles and "I'm fine" or "Everything is great in my life" No one will know the truth that lays beneath the lies only my dreams will tel me that I am not over you nor will I ever get over you. Does time really heal all wounds, or does it just help you figure out how to cover them up like a blemish on your face you cover with make-up? All I know is that no matter what you tell your brain, no matter what you convince yourself you feel. Your heart and dreams will always remind you of the truth of the happiness you had and the sadness that it leaves you filled with now.

So each day, after my dreams end, I will put on my "make-up" and cover up the blemish that lays deep inside.